Tips for newly dating couples

We surveyed dozens of therapists, couples counselors, and relationship experts to identify how couples could best support each other in the first year of marriage. People naturally settle into married life after an eventful year of wedding celebrations, but while couples refocus on their careers and create new priorities, it can feel as though their relationship has fallen to the back burner. This sense of comfort can quickly turn into laziness in love.

Couples should put just as much effort into their marriage as they did when they were just dating. To have a happy, successful marriage in the long-term, aim for a daily dose of undivided attention, physical affection, such as hugging and kissing, and verbal praise, such as complimenting your partner.

For many couples, there is no moment more magical than their wedding day.

After months of planning and prepping and errands and tastings, everything comes together for the perfect celebratory event…But then, real life kicks in.

"We all have expectations, and if we don't share them, they're not going to be met," she says. "Tuesday is not a romantic day, but it happens to be Valentine's Day." It's not a trap, and you're not being coy — you're just asking for what you want.

"You can be with your partner for 50 years, but nobody will be able to meet your expectations unless you share them," she says.

But, the fact that Valentine's Day is technically a calendar holiday is no reason to speed anything up, or put extra pressure on yourself or your relationship, no matter what stage you and your partner are in, she says.

And more importantly, you don't need to pretend like you're living in a bunker and are completely oblivious to the passage of time like some overly chill "cool girl" — you know what day it is.

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If you can’t stand the person but have a great physical relationship, rethink the relationship. If one person is uncomfortable with any type of physical expression, don’t do it. Don’t push a date to do anything that makes him/her feel uncomfortable. You must decide before you go on the date what your limits will be. It’s too difficult to think when passion overtakes you. You can resist temptation if you put on the whole armor of God (Eph. Maybe it was a simple, “I miss you” text during the workday, or a home cooked meal.Creating a daily routine around gratitude will quickly become a favorite time of the day where you feel more connected and intimate. Most marriages go through an adjustment period the first year, especially if you haven’t lived together before.

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